One Year Ago Today

It was exactly a year ago that we found out I was pregnant. I’ve been thinking about this day for a while now and finally found the note in my phone where I had kept somewhat of a journal during those first few months. I considered re-writing it all to make it more concise, but I realized I liked the raw version a lot better. It’s fun to see exactly how I was feeling during each milestone, ya know? So here are my unedited notes from right before we found out, up until Sam felt the baby kick for the first time. Sadly, I stopped keeping track of everything after that, but hey, at least we’ve got these to look back on.

Pre September 23rd

  • So. Much. Nausea!
  • For at least a month, I had completely stopped working out because I was tired all the time and constantly felt nauseous. I felt completely out of it and only wanted to be in the fetal position. Even socializing felt like a chore. I also got a really bad cold that put me out for almost a week, so it was just a lot all at once. I wasn’t sure that I was pregnant, but I need something was up and my boobs were hurting/looking huge. The silver lining, I suppose. Luckily, I just felt really bad and only threw up once. Of course, when I was visiting my mom at her house.

Friday, September 23, 2016 (8 weeks)

  • Went to Target for “date night” on Friday and bought a pregnancy test after going back and forth about whether we should or not.
  • We were too cheap to buy the $30+ tests, so we went with a $6 Up & Up test.
  • I was too nervous to take the test that night, so I waited until Sam was at work. I knew how excited he would be but wasn’t sure I was prepared to see the disappointment on his face if it turned out to be negative.

Sunday, September 25, 2016 (8 weeks)

  • Sam went to work and I finally took the first pregnancy test.
  • I had no idea what I was doing, so I took two within 15 minutes of each around 8 p.m.
  • Both tests showed a vague plus sign, but the horizontal lines were super light and I wasn’t convinced.
  • I researched reviews and read a ton about how users of this specific test got lots of false positives. 

Saturday, October 1, 2016 (9 weeks)

  • Whit freaked me out with her psychic text asking if I was pregnant.
  • I had just ordered another pregnancy test (this time First Response) on Amazon Prime with day-of shipping.
  • This one was a secret and I didn’t tell Sam – even hid the box and wrappers.
  • This pack came with three and I spread them out over the next couple days. All came out VERY positive and VERY fast.

Over the next couple of days, I struggled to figure out what doctor I could go see and finally ended up calling my primary care physician (I was trying to find a female and my current doc is a male). I was finally able to get an appointment for Wednesday, October 5th.

Wednesday, October 5, 2016 (10 weeks)

  • I went to the doctor without telling Sam and the urine test came back positive.
  • The doctor was funny and didn’t know if he should congratulate me or not until I was visibly excited with the result.
  • He referred me to an OB near our apartment, but I had to wait until the referral went through on Friday.
  • Sam and I were going to a Lumineers concert that night and then straight to his dad’s before flying out of LAX the next morning for our Colorado trip.
  • I didn’t want to wait any longer to tell him, so I stopped at a baby store on the way home and bought a little onesie with fire engines all over it and snuck it his suitcase. I tried to lure him into opening it before we left by asking if he had everything and telling he should check one last time. After a couple failed attempts, he finally opened it up to find the onesie and we both laughed and squealed awkwardly. It was the best.
  • We were going to the concert with Josh and Carly, so I had told Car I was doing sober October. I later found out she totally knew something was up when I ordered a pink lemonade and Lay’s chips. Duh.

October 6-9, 2016 (10 weeks)

  • We went to Estes Park and Denver for Ben’s wedding and, in the beer-drinking capital of the world (maybe not, but it totally could be), I had to be sober Sally. It was super fun but also crazy not knowing how far along we were and being the only ones in on the secret.

I finally called my doctor’s office and the earliest I could get an appointment was for almost two weeks later on 9/21. Sam and I were so excited to finally have our first official prenatal appointment and find out how far along we were.

Friday, October 21, 2016 (12 weeks)

  • My appointment was scheduled for 3 p.m. and at around 2 p.m. I got a call from the doctor’s office telling me we had to cancel due to an emergency C-section my doctor had to perform. I literally cried in my car at work because I was so sad I’d have to reschedule. There was so much anticipation building up to that day and it was such a disappointment to have to get through another weekend of not knowing.
  • Luckily, they were able to reschedule me for 8:30 Monday morning.
  • Did I mention that we went into escrow on a condo on 10/17? This was all just too much too handle.

Monday, October 24, 2016 (12 weeks)

  • Sam and I went to see the doctor. She was amazing and we loved her right away. She’s a young mom, really warm, and put us both at ease.
  • For the first time in my life, I got a pap smear with someone other than the doctor in the room. Sam got to experience that fun little event and we officially got a glimpse into our no-boundaries future of pregnancy and parenthood.
  • Since I didn’t know when my last period was, the doctor was only able to estimate that I was about 6-9 weeks pregnant. I’d need an ultrasound to know for sure.
  • I had to go back to work and try to schedule the ultrasound. Sam was meeting his mom and our realtor to walk through the condo, so I had to schedule it without him.
  • I went to the Hoag in Huntington Beach and found out that I was WAY farther along than anticipated. 12 weeks and 5 days at that point, with the due date being May 3, 2017.
  • The ultrasound was seriously the coolest thing. Getting to see the most perfect profile and a full-blown baby on the screen was incredible. I was in such shock after finding out how far along I was that I was just grinning like an idiot. No tears but when the technician left the room, I was definitely talking out loud saying, “I can’t believe it” over and over. Sam was going into a movie but was clearly anxious to hear. I couldn’t bring myself to text him the news so I called him before the movie started and spilled the beans.
  • I got a disc of photos and short video clips and we told Paula that night when she was over for dinner.

Wednesday, November 16, 2016 (16 weeks)

  • Sam, my mom, Paula, Michael, Alyssa, and Clint all came to our “early gender reveal” ultrasound off 19th in Costa Mesa. We had been told my two ultrasound technicians that it was likely a girl because of the “angle of the dangle,” but we found out that night that they were wrong. It was very clearly a boy!!! I seriously was in shock. Sam and I were mostly just going in with the intention of confirming it was a girl…we had no idea they’d throw us for a loop. It was the best surprise ever and everyone got to be in the room to see it all on a couple big screens. We did a 3D ultrasound too, but he really just looked like a little alien at that point.

Saturday, December 17, 2016 (20 weeks)

  • Whit spilled the beans that she’s pregnant too!!! Bestie baby dream come true!

Tuesday, January 10, 2017 (23 weeks)

  • The end of week 23 and I finally felt kicks after my first day back to lunch-time yoga at work! I had heard it felt like little popcorn kernels popping but it felt more like a flutter. I wasn’t sure it was a kick until I was lying on my back that night and felt multiple flutters. Such an amazing feeling! It definitely seems more real now knowing the little dude is kicking and moving around.

Saturday, January 14, 2017 (24 weeks)

  • Sam and I were in our Palm Springs hotel room and he was lying on my belly while we were watching TV. It was his birthday eve and he felt a kick right on his cheek! So much excitement! I was so glad he was able to experience it so soon after me because I was worried I’d feel all this movement earlier on and he’d be a little left out. Shit is getting real!

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xo,

Bree

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